The Week That Is ...

After my fun-filled Saturday, I've had a pretty cruisy week thus far. Three failed attempts to catch up with One Particular Boy from Saturday night, work and lots of internet-ing. Far too much of the latter actually. Tsk tsk.

One Particular Boy and I spoke of going to the movies on both Monday and Tuesday nights, but he's been working far too much overtime and, bless his socks, he's been getting home feeling too tired to go out. Then last night was State of Origin (and we shall not mention that again!) and we were going to catch up, but his dad turned up at the wrong time and it just wasn't going to be worth him coming up my way. Ho hum.

Tonight I'm going to see Wil Anderson which I'm really looking forward to. After my ticket dramas (ie. I lost it!) it's handy to know that the venue accommodates for fools like me, and I've been instructed to collect a 'Lost Ticket Pass' - here's hoping it's not something huge and embarrassing that draws attention to the fact that you can't keep track of one piece of cardboard for a mere couple of weeks! It'll be a fun evening, I'm sure. Hopefully I'll have nice people sitting near me, as I'm going alone. I've missed out on too many events in the past by trying to organise people to come with me, so I bit the bullet this time and opted for a date with myself.

Tomorrow night we have EOFY ('End of Financial Year' for those not up, or is it down, with the lingo) drinks for work. Now THAT will be fun. Especially with no boyfriend at home waiting for me/worrying about me. Let's not go there though, this is supposed to be a happy post ;)

There's a possibility I'll get to see One Particular Boy tomorrow night too. So please please please keep your fingers crossed for me. I Like this one and am super keen to see him again. Oh. Crap. I said 'Super Keen'. About a boy. Hmmm.

I shall run along now, and try and rid the thoughts of One Particular Boy from my mind (ha!). After all, I'm supposed to be having a year of being single ...

xx

The Weekend That Was

I love awesome weekends. The ones that are just fun-filled and you look back on it on Sunday night and don't feel like you wasted a single minute (although you probably did, but the unwasted minutes were that great that they overrule the wasted ones). I was lucky enough to have an awesome weekend this weekend.

Saturday I lunched with the ladies, and Trudy and I shared a bottle of bubbles in celebration of my divorce-a-versary. Then we headed to the pub for a cocktail. Oh how I love cocktails.
The Southbank Markets were on, so we decided to wander around them. I love markets, and soon discovered that going to the markets whilst slightly intoxicated is not the best idea. Although I do love my purchases! (Two funky pairs of earrings, a 'Rex Manning Day' t-shirt, a cute belly bar & a pair of earrings that were purchased by a friend as a belated birthday present)

Back to the pub for a jug. Trudy encouraged a little Trixie to come out when I spotted a couple of cute boys. Haha. Trixie wasn't ready to come out though, so I ended up with a pint of beer that I really didn't feel like drinking!
Home by about 5-5.30pm and I was ready to keep going. Or sleep. Keep going it was, and I headed out to meet up with a friend.

What a night.

Drinking, dancing, playing the tambourine so hard that I bruised myself. An unknown cut on my foot, and some kind of black tar-like substance on my feet. Good times, good times.

Drunken wisdom had me stay at a friends place much further away from the city than my own place. Then in the morning we realised that I had no way of getting home as the friends car was not at the house. Fortunately this was soon remedied, and I got back to my place sometime around 9.30-10 this morning. Not a bad effort in my books!

I really enjoy nights like last night. Having an absolute blast and not having a care in the world. It was the first time I'd been out with this group of friends, but hopefully not the last. I did tell a few of them (numerous times I think!) that they were my new best friends and they weren't allowed to go out again with out me. I amuse me.

And now it's 10pm and time for me to try and get some shut eye.

Here's to fun times with fun friends.

xx

"It's a small world after all..."

Talk about a freaky Friday! Rather than try and work out a comprehensible way of describing what happened to encourage me to draw this conclusion, I shall summarise in point form:

Before continuing however, please note that I live in a different city and state to the one in which I grew up, and to get to my home town, you'd need to head south and continue driving for about 17 hours.

• I take a call from a broker
• My computer freezes and we chat about random things
• I discover that this broker got married in a town about 1 hour north of my home town & that her husband grew up in this area
• My computer continues to be uncooperative so I say I'll call her back
• I am finally able to search for her email, and recognise her surname
• When I call her back I mention that I worked with a lady with the same surname
• She asks me what this lady's name is ... It's her sister-in-law!!!

Crazily small world, dear readers, crazily small world.

Do any of you have any small world stories to share?

Time for Reflection ... and Celebration

I should wait until Sunday to write this post, but I plan on killing numerous braincells on Saturday night, and doubt I'll be in the mood to write this. Let's be honest, I doubt I'll be in the mood for anything bar mindless television and greasy food (before long, the proprietors of my local takeaway will be able to pick when I've been out the night before).
But I digress ...

So, what I reflecting on, and celebrating? And what is so significant about Sunday?
Sunday marks the 1st anniversary of my freedom, ie. my divorce.

My ex-husband and I seperated early in 2007. I had begun to doubt my place in the relationship, and my feelings towards my him. Add in the fact that I was extremely unhappy with where my life was going (crappy job, and little chance of changing it; spending my days being a 'housewife', at home, alone, dwelling ...) and it wasn't a good time.
We spoke openly and honestly and I confessed that I didn't love him like I once did, and I wasn't sure if I ever could again. My heart was breaking for both of us. I felt like a failure, and I felt like I'd let him down. It appeared that somewhere, deep down, he understood though, because he asked me "If you could ever love me like you used to, would you want to?" (not the exact words, but close to it).
I hesitated, and in that hesitation was my answer. This was the man I had married. The man I had promised to love for the rest of my life, and I couldn't bring myself to say that I did want to love him in the same way as I did when I made that promise.
It was over.

The time between then and now has been liberating, strengthening, emotional. A complete rollercoaster of emotion. It was not a clean break, as there was financial involvement, and I found myself experiencing some incredibly dark days, and some very disturbing emotions. Somehow, I held my head high, soldiered on, and got through it. When I think back on how low I was feeling during my worst days, I'm amazed at my own strength.

I did have some support during the divorce procedure, in the form of my now ex-boyfriend. I'll be eternally thankful to him for being there, and for wiping away my tears. For hugging me, and holding me, and just letting me sob.

The day the divorce papers arrived, I didn't know how to feel. Relief was one, as that chapter of my life was closed, and my ex-husband and I could now go on with our new lives. At the same time though, I felt like a failure. Divorced at 24. I remember signing for the papers, then closing the door and just looking at them. Then I sat on the lounge and cried uncontrollably. I wasn't even sure why I was crying, and I still don't really know. Pick an emotion and there's a good chance I was experiencing it in that moment.

On June 21, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders, and I had a new lease on life. I was officially divorced. While deep down inside I was still experiencing the sadness, I found the strength to laugh, and to remind myself that I'm only human. I'm not the first person to go through this, and I won't be the last.

It was the best decision for both him and I. We've both now moved on. He recently became a father, and I recently became single again. When we were together, I was the one desperately wanting to start a family, and he was the one who was happy for things to keep going as they were and just enjoy life together. Funny how things change. Now the idea of having children scares the shit out of me to be honest. I couldn't be happier with my life though. Sure, I still have crappy days, but if I look at all the good in my life, I'd be a fool to complain.

I don't regret getting married, but I do regret the fact that I couldn't stay true to my marriage vows. I also regret the fact that I've made my ex-husband apprehensive about marrying again. He doesn't deserve to feel that.

Normally, when it comes to regret, I prefer to say "Mistakes made, lessons learnt", but sometimes the mistakes are a little too big to be considered mistakes. So I'll allow myself that one regret. Wedding vows should never be considered a mistake, and in that moment, I did believe every word I said.

Onwards and upwards, I'm being true to myself, and in turn, I'm being true to him. I wish him every success in life, and I hope that he feels the same.

Here's to life, adventure and freedom to be yourself.

xx

Favourite Photo Friends

It's really simple. I love how every photo tells a story. Some short stories, some long tales. I want to know what is your favourite photo of yourself. Everyone has one. The photo they look at and smile. It reminds them of something, some time, some place. A moment in time.

So share the photo, share the story and then tag three other people. I want to see photos and stories all around the blogosphere.

I was tagged by Leila @ That Random Leila

I don't have many pictures on my laptop at the moment, but of the ones I do have, this would probably be my favourite:

It was the night of my 25th birthday, and I took this photo as we were heading into the city to have dinner. I was determined to have a fantastic 25th after having so many birthdays that were less memorable, and I had just that. By this time of the night I'd already consumed almost an entire bottle of bubbles (LOL) so I was feeling very happy and in the mood to have loads of fun with my awesome friends. My 25th birthday was definitely a birthday I'd happily relive :)

My turn to tag now, so I'm tagging:
April @ A City Girl in the Country
Lara @ I wanna be a MUA
Kevin @ Something Like That

Adventures, where are you?!

So my life's been a little lacking in adventure post Monday's frivolities. I guess working during the week kind of inhibits one's ability to have adventures, but there's always Friday & Saturday night ... Not this weekend though, and in a way I'm happy with that. It's actually allowing me to be a little more productive at home. Oops.

However, in my desire to be productive this morning, I've hit a roadblock. In trying to organise my room, and actually Hang My Clothes, I discovered that what I thought was the case is the case. A coathanger shortage. Hmph.
I've also realised that I really do need to purchase a chest of drawers. Double hmph. Somehow, I don't think I'm going to be able to transport a chest of drawers - even if flatpacked - from a furniture store to my home on public transport. Bugger. Need to somehow find an inexpensive chest of drawers that can be delivered to my home. Interesting.

Adventurous or what?!

Utter Shock

Wow. I am in such utter shock right now that I just need to write to try and process it.

In my exploration of Facebook, checking out what friends are up to, having a look through the 'Groups' I'm in and seeing if anything's happening, I noticed a group that some of my friends are in and couldn't believe what I was seeing.

A guy that I went to primary school with, granted only for two years but I have fond memories of those two years, committed suicide earlier this year. Reading the words that informed me that he had taking his own life shocked me to the core. Even as an 8/9 year old, you could tell he was the kind of guy who was going to go places. He was incredibly intelligent, and a genuine nice guy. I read the comments that people had written about him and saw that nothing had changed. His friends shared such loving memories of him, it was really touching to read.

I'm all over the place and shocked right now. Remembering the guy I had a crush on in year 3, the guy who taught me how to write so that the letters looked like they would look if shown on a calculator, the guy who I did a project on Cicadas with :)

I could get all deep and thought-provoking about suicide, but I won't. I'll leave it at that, and continue to process the shock and wonder why, but knowing that he was a much-loved guy and destined for great things on this earth.

May he rest in peace.

Down in Funky Town

I have no idea what my problem is at the moment. I'm just blah. Everything is blah. Lacking motivation to do anything. Maybe I'm still recovering from the flu? Maybe it's PMS (highly likely)? The stupidest thing is that I recognise that I'm feeling low/blah/in a funk and I want to get out of it, but I just couldn't be bothered.

Not good. I've re-read my 'Letter to Myself' (well, looked at it and remembered what I told myself) a couple of times, and as soon as I see it it cheers me up, but then I click away from the page and within 10 minutes I'm back down in Funky Town.

I should stop thinking about things and just get up and do them.

Every morning when I'm trying to find something to wear to work, I look at the mess in my room and think 'I should really tidy that up, I'll start it tonight'. Then every evening when I step foot in my room again I think 'Yeah, nah, I'll wait til the weekend'. Then the weekend rolls around and I feel all kinds of crappy at the thought that the only plans I have for the weekend are to do housework. Can you blame me? I know the rewards will be worth it. All my clothes all washed and cleaned and hung up. Until I realise that I don't have enough room in my wardrobe for all my clothes and decide to leave half of them on the floor. Viscious cycle. I'm my worst enemy.

Alright. Enough of the procrastination. I'm going to get off my freaking back (would've said arse, but I'm still lying in bed) and go and do a load of washing and do some other housework. No time like the present, and clean clothes are kind of handy.
I may even unload the dishwasher *faints with shock*

Have a lovely weekend dear readers. Perhaps I'll have more adventures to tell you later.

xx

Letter to Myself

I've been in a bit of a weird headspace the last few days, but I'm getting there. To try and get through it, I decided to send myself an email which I'm going to share here. Maybe you'll get something out of it too?

Sometimes you just need to step back, slow down and take a deep breath.

Take time to stop, think, appreciate all that you have in life.

A roof over your head, food to eat, a steady job. Life itself.

Appreciate the people who appreciate you. If they don’t take the time, they’re not worth your time. Don’t constantly be the one making the effort. The ones who matter will be prepared to make the effort too.

When you’re feeling down, don’t let it overwhelm you. Have a cry, a vent, do what you need to do to cope with it, but don’t let it consume you. Deal with it. Seriously. Not in the harsh ‘HTFU’ sense, but in the ‘Let’s work through this’ sense.

You’ve been through so much already and you’ve Gotten Through It. You Are Strong.

Stop doubting yourself. Wake up every morning and tell yourself that you’re strong. And believe it because it is true.

You may not always feel strong, but trust me, you are. You haven’t give up, yet, have you? You’ve been through worse before and gotten through it. This is nothing. Embrace the person that you are, and embrace the good in your life.

Get up, get out. Go for a walk, go for a run. Take time to be yourself, however you need to do it. Don’t spend so much time inside though. Stop going on the internet so much. Stay in touch with reality. Go and wander around the shops for a while, grab a coffee and people watch. Go into the city and wander around the gardens. Better yet, walk into the city.

Stay in touch with friends and catch up with them regularly. Do some baking and invite them over for coffee and yummy baked treats.

Don’t let people get to you, but if they do, step back look at what they’re saying to you and see if it’s really that bad. If it is, cut them out. You only get one chance at this life, don’t let the toxic people take over and sap your energy like a leech. They’re not worth your time if they can’t appreciate who you are.

The number one thing though, is for You to appreciate You. Appreciate every little thing about yourself. Including the flaws. If you can’t appreciate the flaws, fix them. You need to love the person that you are and be confident in every step you take and every decision you make.

Love life and love yourself.

If I do say so myself, there are some pretty wise words in there. I can be like that at times. Other times I just ramble.

The Person Behind the Blog

I've been trying to think of a story to share with you all. Something that gets deep inside Gemma's mind and gives you a bit of insight into the person sitting at her laptop typing these words.

I'm trying to track back to my childhood and think of a tale to tell, but nothing's coming to mind. It's as though I only have brief memories of my childhood, random flashbacks of things. Nothing that's stayed with me forever and will always be a part of me. Maybe I prefer to forget the past and enjoy the present to ignore the events that I wish had never happened. To remove the dark memories and focus on making future memories brighter.

A part of me wishes I could remember more from my childhood, but when I do try and take myself back, the things I do remember sadden me. It wasn't a traumatic childhood, but I'd prefer a different one if I had the choice. There are people out there who have had worse experiences, and I feel a great sympathy for them. I feel that mine was quite emotionally straining. Some people are shocked when they hear about certain aspects of my childhood. Like the fact that my sister and I were brought up solely by our father. I love him dearly and am eternally thankful for the fact that I had such a wonderful father. A father whose main purpose in life was to ensure the happiness of his two daughters. We have a good relationship now, but I still feel somewhat reserved when I'm sharing my life with him. There are times that I feel like I'm a failure in his eyes. Got a crap UAI in my HSC, dropped out of uni, left my husband at age 22 and moved interstate, divorced at 24. They don't make me less of a person, I know that, but I feel that I should've done more by now.
I remember when I was living with a 'friend', in between leaving my husband and moving to Queensland. A feeling of complete and utter loss and loneliness overwhelmed me and I didn't know what to do. I felt hopeless. Alone. Like a complete and utter failure. I rang my dad in tears, just needing to hear a familiar and reassuring voice. I got that, but not much else. He just said that there was nothing he could do because he was too far away. Then he asked me to never ring him again if I was in that frame of mind. That broke my heart.

My mother and I have had a strange relationship. At times close, at other times distant. When we're close, it feels like we're sisters or good friends rather than mother and daughter. My boyfriends mothers have always loved me. I latch onto them and get close to them, wanting a female figure to look up to. Friendships with females seem to have a tendency to die off for me though. We'll be close, and then slowly drift apart. Much like the on/off relationship I have with my mother.

All through my life, I've looked for someone to latch onto. A companion to spend time with so that I didn't have to spend time with myself. Now I know that I need to spend time with myself, or I can't give all that I am to my partner. I need to admit to myself who I am and be proud of that person. If at any stage I don't feel proud of what I'm doing or who I am, I need to change that. There's only one person in control of my life: me. So I need to take control of it and appreciate what I have to offer. To nurture my finer points, and tweak the not-so-fine.

The person behind the blog isn't really sure who she is some days, but usually, she thinks she's a pretty okay kinda gal.

Monday Madness Recap

So, 'Trudy' and I decided to go to the Pub for lunch yesterday, with the intention of accompanying the meal with a cold beverage or two.
We met at 1pm, I got home some time around 8pm feeling a just a teensy bit boozier than I had when I left home.
Okay, a lot boozier.
What kind of fool goes drinking with 'Trudy' on a Monday afternoon, knowing that they have to work the next day. 'Trudy' can drink. A lot. Without it affecting her much. Gemma ... weelllll ... Not so much. Am impressed with my efforts though. It started off with one beer. Then we decided to buy jugs. We had two between us (or maybe it was three), then I decided I felt like vodka. Then 'Trudy' won a $25 voucher that had to be used that day. No time like the present, hey? So we had a Cosmo each. Then another vodka. Then another Cosmo.
I really shouldn't try and remember how much I drank. My head hurts enough as it is.

I also left with a cute guy's phone number, and by the time I went to sleep last night, I'd scored myself a movie date for Wednesday night. Not with that guy though. He was actually kind of lame. He was all "Any other night but tonight". Pfft. Can only imagine what his very encouraging mates were saying to him after 'Trudy' and I left. Whatev. Neeeeexxxt!
My movie date is with a guy I saw a couple of times pre my last relationship. In my drunken stupor I texted him about "Any other night" guy and he showered me with sms flattery, then suddenly he asks me if I want to go out to a movie. Lucky I was already lying down, or else I would've fallen down. Not from the alcohol. We've never actually been on a date before, and normally the texts I get from him are a little X-Rated and late at night. They keep me very amused. So I was suitably stunned that he wants to actually take me out to the movies.

Will report back after the 'date' has taken place. Until then, I need to get myself ready for work so that I'm in the city early enough to grab a greasy breakfast. Bloody 'Trudy'.



NB: Yes, 'Trudy' is a real person, however 'Trudy' is not her real name. "Any other night" guys friends decided her name is 'Trudy' and I'm running with it. Why the heck not?

Marvellous Monday

Normally, I'm not Monday's biggest fan. I don't mind them, but I wouldn't go out of my way to endure one.

Today, however, is different. In the wonderful Land Down Under, today is a Public Holiday. It's the "Queens Birthday" Public Holiday, despite the fact that it's not actually her birthday today, but generally you don't hear many complaints from the Aussies about that fcat.

A whole extra day of the weekend? What to do with it?
For starters, I'm going to keep up with my 'long weekend tradition' (started this long weekend) of laying in bed for a while, blogging, general netting, and perhaps a little more Gilmore Girls watching.
At some stage, I'll probably do some washing, so that I don't turn up to work tomorrow in some totally mismatched ensemble. Not that I'd do that, I do tend to put in a bit of effort, but if washing isn't done, well, things could change. I think I need a maid.
My Sunday Session was also postponed, so the plan is now to head to the Pub for lunch and a couple of beverages. If that gets postponed I won't be the happiest of campers - I've spent far too much time in this house and in this bed over the last week. No, seriously, there is a clear dent where I have been laying for pretty much the last week. It's actually kind of disturbing. Fear not though, I have actually changed the sheets and washed my doona cover. I'm not entirely laying here in my own dead skin cells.
Perhaps I'll also try and discover what the missing ingredient is from my soup. Hopefully it's something in my pantry, because I'm not sure I feel like making a trip to the supermarket. Although having said that, I should get some exercise at some stage today. Perhaps I'll even walk the 3km to the Pub. It's quite a lovely looking day outside.

On that note, I think I'll go and do something productive (Read: Throw some clothes in the washing machine and then hope the weather turns sour so I can then throw them in the dryer).

I may be back later. My fellow blogger Kevin has inspired me to perhaps share a story of my childhood. If you choose to read his stories before I get the chance to post one of my own, please note that my writing is doubtful to even come close to the standard of his. Nor will my stories be quite as eventful, but they'll generally be autobiographical. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Until then

xx

Slow Cooker Sunday

Okay, so this is hardly an 'adventure' but this blog is about my life too, and today is Slow Cooker Sunday.

Currently in my slow cooker, I have a chicken & vegetable soup simmering away and, if I do say so myself, it smells darn good!
No recipe, just a bunch of ingredients, so time will tell as to whether or not it tastes as good as it smells :)

Slow Cooker Sunday Chicken & Vegie Soup
Sprinkle 4x chicken drumsticks with Italian Seasoning
Top with 1L of vegetable stock (I used the liquid, rather than cubes & water), and approx 1L of water
Chop up 2x zucchini, 2x carrot, 2x celery stalks, 3x shallots & 2x cloves of garlic and throw them in
Add some parsley and basil (I used half a small 'sachet' of each, from the Gourmet Gardens 6 pack)
Stir it all up, pop the lid on and switch the slow cooker onto 'Auto'

Leave it for hours and hours (I'm just going to wait until the chicken starts falling off the bone) and then enjoy with some yummy bread.

*Hopefully* it's delish!


Enjoy your Sunday, dear readers, I'm going back to my DVD watching while I await confirmation of my Sunday Session plans.

xx

Elephants keep dancing on my head ...

Okay, so it's supposed to be raindrops, and they're supposed to be falling, but today, it has certainly not felt like there are raindrops falling on my head. Raindrops falling on my head would be lovely. Instead, I feel like there are elephants using my noggin as a frickin dancefloor and it does not feel nice at all.

This flu just won't budge. My head is throbbing, I have no energy, lights are beginning to hurt my eyes, I just want to sleep.
I'm truly a bundle of joy. Forget cutesy little babies being bundles of joy. A grumpy, tired, achey 25-year-old is so much more joyful.

In the last week, I've spent more time in/on my bed (besides sleeping) than I have anywhere else. No word of a lie. Even sitting on the lounge requires too much effort - that and daytime television really doesn't appeal to me, nor does watching TV on a ridiculously small television. My bed is indented from where I've been laying, proving to me I've spent too much of my life in relationships because it's to one side rather than smack bang in the middle. Anyone know where I can find a human-size teddy bear that weighs the same as a human?

Am I digressing now? I really don't know. My elephant stomped brain is muddled. I'm fairly sure this has now become - possibly always was - one of those pointless posts, at the end of which readers wish they had their time back and hadn't wasted it reading this.

I'm fairly sure I'm making no sense whatsoever now. So I'll let the elephants get back to their tango and wish you all a good morning/afternoon/evening (select appropriate time of day).

xx

Make Me Over!

Yesterday, in my blah-ness, I decided I couldn't be bothered waiting until Tuesday to get my hair cut. That and it was really starting to annoy me - it was becoming a little too Mrs Brady for my liking!

Fortunately, I live within walking distance of a few different hairdressers, so I called one and voila! I have an appointment!
Hair cut and an eyebrow wax later, I still spend less than I would've on a cut alone at the other hairdresser. I'm a happy lady.
Until I get home. And realise that I desperately need to colour it.

So today is makeover day! I'm going dark brown - again. I thought about going lighter, but its too much effort to maintain and I think dark suits me better.

Have I gone insane?

While my head's not throbbing too badly, I decided to use my time wisely and conduct a bit of research about what there is to see and do in Paris.

I found myself a useful little site with lists of the things there are to see and do in Paris, and it's got me thinking that I just want to take J's suggestion of just 'showing up and exploring' and run with it.
The plan thus far is 5 days in Paris, 5 days in Prague and 5 days in Amsterdam (was going to do 5, 4, 5 but what's an extra day, hey?). Surely 5 days is sufficient time to explore and wander and discover new and exciting things about a culture that is totally alien to me? I'm uncertain at this stage as to whether J will be joining me in Prague & Amsterdam, but if so, he has been to both of these cities (well, der, he lives in The Netherlands, of course he's been to Amsterdam!) and can be my tour guide - he doesn't know this yet ;) He'll be joining me in Paris, and he's yet to explore Paris himself, so I'm sure we'd be able to keep ourselves well entertained for 5 days, right?
I fear that if I create a list of things I want to see/do/experience, I'll be bitterly disappointed if I miss out on something, or if it's not as fabulous as my wild imagination has created it to be in my mind. If I just show up and run amok, with J in tow, I think it would be much more fun, and really be the Adventure I'm wanting it to be.

Tell me I'm crazy if you wish, but doesn't the idea of 5 days in Paris, wandering around finding wonderful things to see/do/experience, with no planned itinerary sound pretty darn cool?

Thursday Tidbit

Well, I lasted two hours at work. Until the nausea and dizziness kicked in and I just couldn't bear to be there any more.
Off home, into my 'nest'. Under the doona, dvd on, teddy bear to cuddle. Achiness, dizziness and nausea are free to leave my body at any time they deem appropriate - but really, sooner would be better. I'm thinking this all a combination of leftover cold/flu symptons rearing their ugly head again and an adverse reaction to the two local anesthetics I had yesterday at the dentist.
Fun times for all.

So what am I watching?
Gilmore Girls
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days - nothing like a bit of Matthew to cheer a girl up. Seriously, that man makes the world 'Bullshit' sexy *swoon*

And at the moment, on repeat, I'm listening to Krezip: Sweet Goodbyes (on repeat) J sent it to me in a chat one night and I love love love it. I now have their 'Best of' album, but this song is just gorgeous. It may also make me think of him, which may also make me happy.

Hope everyone else is having a healthy Thursday!
xx

Lust

Given I'm heading to Europe during the Northern Hemisphere winter, I'm rather ill-prepared winter-clothing-wise for the temperatures that I will encounter.
So I've decided to splurge and buy myself a lovely coat, and then I'll stock up on long-sleeve tees, scarves, knit jumpers - cheap basics that will do the trick.
I have found a gorgeous coat that I have fallen in lust with.
Isn't she beautiful?



She's really not *that* expensive, but I'm just not sure if I can justify the amount. So I shall sit and wait for a similar one to be marked down to a bargain price.
The object of my lust can be found here

More Planning

I decided to research my Europe trip a little more yesterday, and step one was to pick what cities I want to visit.
Into my 'Europe on a Shoestring' I delved, laptop at the ready to convert currencies and work out where was going to fit into my budget. Paris: non-negotiable, must be at Eiffel Tower on Valentines Day, so might as well see the rest of the city; Amsterdam: free accommodation, would be absurd to pass up on that; Anywhere in Italy: my guide suggested that it would be double the cost of either Paris or Amsterdam. Hmmm.
Flicky flick, check the map for cities that aren't *too* far away, as I want to limit travel time and maximise explore time. Consider somewhere in Switzerland (dreaming of chocolate here) but decide against it (can't recall why) then recall a suggestion of Prague. Straight to the section on the Czech Republic, tappity tap into a currency convertor. Done. Prague is it. Ridiculously cheap and J advises me that it's an amazing city. I'm sold. Accommodation for about 12AUD a night? I think I can handle that. Yes, it's in a dorm room, but it's only for four nights. Paris accommodation will be a private room, Amsterdam accommodation in J's house. I think I can handle four nights in a 10-bed dorm room if it's going to cost me less than $50.

Basic itinerary as it stands: Brisbane to Paris, Paris to Prague, Prague to Amsterdam, Amsterdam to Paris, Paris to Brisbane. (It's cheaper to get a return flight, from what I've found so far, and I'm sure I could handle a jaunt back to Paris!)

But I'm not excited ... Honest?

Wednesday Waffle

I think my body has finally had enough of it's recent abuse (read: enjoying single life way too much, and consuming copious amounts of alcohol, as well as neglecting to nourish it with vitamins) and it's screaming at me to slow down and focus.

After eating a rather tasty lunch yesterday, a wave of nausea washed over me and I hightailed it to the bathroom three times within about 10 minutes. I was **this** close to full-on bolting down the corridor, but decided that running may further upset my stomach and got the power-walk down pat instead.

Back to my desk and 'Holy bejeebers!'. Feels like someone has put a clamp on my head. Oh, wait, and now they're spinning me. Dizziness, headaches, oh and lucky me, the heart starts racing. A colleague sees me and I must've looked a sight, because he appeared somewhat shocked. I stumbled the half a dozen or so steps to my leaders desk, and requested that I go home.

Somehow survived a rather loud but entertaining bus trip (3pm bus = school boys. Teenagers. Oh joy.) and got myself home to the comfort of my bed. The next several hours were spent feeling sorry for myself/dozing/dvd watching/aching and sharing war stories with a friend. We were both feeling about as cheery as each other. Awesome.

This morning, I allowed myself a sleep-in to recuperate. I thought I was fine. Breakfast went down a treat (raisin toast always does, nom nom nom) then off to the shower. Who knew standing up could require so much effort. I managed to stay in there for an age though, just enjoying the hot water on my back, but knew that my body had had enough of it's recent mistreatment, and it would not allow me to endure a days work. Fun times.

So today, I will toddle off to the chemist to stock up on vitamins, and also to the supermarket, where I will purchase the ingredients required to actually cook myself Proper Meals. Bugger how depressing it feels to cook For One. Once again, my mind loves it's lame arse excuses.

This weekend will be All About Gemma in attempt to get my body back into order. Relaxing, reading, time with friends and cooking. Sounds perfect. And no alcohol. Yes, that's right. No Alcohol.

A Moment of Vanity ...

Last night, I made the decision that this morning I would return to the gym.
Then I had a strange night's sleep, although short as I went to sleep later than usual, but still woke up fairly early, and woke up feeling a little less enthusiastic than I was feeling at 10pm.
Peeling my eyes open to check the time on my phone, I thought 'Yep, I can still make it, I just won't do the class'. My body disagreed and the mind/body argument ensued. During this internal battle, I concluded that the only way to settle this was to let my hair decide.
You think I've gone nuts now, don't you?
See, no matter what length my hair is, I always end up with bed hair. Bad bed hair.
I sat up, and looked in the mirror. Frightful. I combed it to an almost public-worthy state, but realised I still have a big foof of hair at the back that clearly says "I've just woken up". I considered just going for a walk so I got *some* exercise, but decided 'Nope, not even acceptable for that'.

So much for making the most of my late starts, and going to the gym to keep myself in shape for winter. I mean, it's important that I look good before I even hit the treadmill, right?

Sometimes I really worry about the thoughts that run through my brain. I'm far too good at making up excuses ...

xx

The Planning Begins!

Over the next 8 months or so, I'll be updating on the progress of My European Adventure plans. I'm so excited, I could blog about it every day, but I won't :)

One of my lovely friends, and her boyfriend, were kind enough to buy me a bookstore voucher for my birthday, so that I could buy myself a Lonely Planet guide. So this morning, off I toddled, straight to the Travel Section and picked up 'Europe on a Shoestring'. I thought about getting a more localised guide, but given that I am having strong thoughts of further travel, figured this would best suit my needs.
All day, I sat and thought about that book sitting in my bag, wanting to rifle through it and fill my mind with all things Europe! Somehow I resisted (the numerous emails waiting to be processed could've had some impact) until around 4.30pm, when I had a bit of a flick through and excitement filled me once again.
There's so much to see and do, I just know that I'm going to want to be back on the plane as soon as I leave. I will contain myself though, and focus on three cities for now. Paris, Amsterdam and somewhere in Italy. Possibly Venice. I'll do a few days per city and explore to my heart's content.

This week will also see the start to my savings. I'll have to live to tight budget to save enough in time, but it be so rewarding to land in Paris next February, on the start of an adventure into what will feel like another world.

*sigh* February, how I long to see you ...

xx

ETA - Eek! Passport application is complete! Photos to be taken, application to be sent. It's happening!!

What the?! Winter already?!

Here we are, dear readers, on the first day of June, and for those of us lucky enough to live in the Southern Hemisphere, the first day of winter.

I'm really not a big fan of winter, but fortunately they're bearable in Queensland. Having said that, in my two winters here there have been some [expletive] cold days. Scarves, coats and boots help, but some days it just plain sucks when you have to roll out of bed and get up as the cold air wafts through the cracks in the floor boards, chilling your poor little feety feet.
Winter is the time for snuggles under the doona (with my teddy bear of course), hot chocolates (must remember to purchase marshmallows!) and comfort food (soups, casseroles, pasta ... Bye-bye waistline ...).

In an ideal a fantasy world, come winter, I'd be whisked away to either the other side of the world to enjoy summer, or to New Zealand to indulge in some skiing. Unfortunately, that's not my life, so instead, I'm left to hope that, as has been the case in my previous Queensland winters, we only get one or two weeks of "[expletive] me dead, it's cold! Why can't I stay in bed?!" days. Considering the season is three months long, I guess one or two weeks is acceptable. I guess. If it has to be.
I should actually be extremely thankful for the fact that we only have a short time of ridiculously cold weather - which, might I add, is probably not all that cold to a lot of people - and harden the [expletive] up. Why? Well, as revealed a couple of posts ago, this winter loving gal (ha!) is heading to PARIS in FEBRUARY. Yes. A Northern Hemisphere city in Winter. Wise move, hey? I can guarantee you I will be shopping up a storm whenever I see winter clothing on sale. Somehow, I fear that my 'Queensland Winter Staples' won't quite cut it in Paris. And I'm not talking about the fashion here people. My warmest winter item is a 3-sizes-too-large dressing gown. Hmmm. Probably a good thing I'll only be over there for two weeks, or my travel budget may need to be re-worked entirely.

Here's to winter, snuggles, hot chocolates and doona-filled weekends.

xx